Tune-In Tuesday: Fall Apart




Welcome to Tune-In Tuesday! If this is your first time visiting on a Tuesday, I hope you will find this as a place to worship together. Each week, I share about a song that God is using in my life. One that is speaking to me in whatever season I may be going through. The invitation is for you to jump in and do it, too! Here are the steps:

  1. Pick a song that is especially meaningful for you at this time in your life and write about it. Really think about the lyrics… and let them change you.
  2. Link up here using the linky tool at the bottom of this post. Use the name of your song as the title of your link. (If you haven’t done this before, feel free to email me with questions.) If you don't have a blog, you can leave a comment sharing your song. ***Please use the permalink to your post, not your blog's main site. Because of the specialized nature of this weekly series, any links that are not specifically for Tune-In Tuesday will be deleted.***
  3. Visit other people’s blogs and worship with them.
  4. Spread the word. Grab the button in the left column and add it to your post. That way, others can link up, as well. Tweet about it… Try to get others in on the conversation.
  5. And the main thing… worship! :) 

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My song for today is Fall Apart by Josh Wilson. LOVE this song. Press play below to listen and then read on for lyrics and some thoughts.

Why in the world did I think I could
Only get to know you when my life was good
When everything just falls in place
The easiest thing is to give You praise

Now it all seems upside down

‘Cause my whole world is caving in
But I feel You now more than I did then
How can I come to the end of me
And somehow still have all I need
God, I want to know You more
Maybe this is how it starts
I find You when I fall apart

Blessed are the ones who understand
We’ve got nothing to bring but empty hands
Nothing to hide and nothing to prove
Our heartbreak brings us back to You

And it all seems upside down

‘Cause my whole world is caving in
But I feel You now more than I did then  
 

How can I come to the end of me
And somehow still have all I need
God, I want to know You more
Maybe this is how it starts
I find You when I fall apart

I don’t know how long this will last
I’m praying for the pain to pass
But maybe this is the best thing that
Has ever happened to me

My whole world is caving in
But I feel You now more than I did then
How can I come to the end of me
And somehow still have all I need
God, I want to know You more
Maybe this is how it starts
I find You when
You will find me when I fall apart

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Over the last several months, I have gone through a pretty significant spiritual battle. Significant life changes. Depression. Anger. Bitterness. Frustration. Hurt. Feelings of rejection in every area of my life. Heartbreaking feelings of being nudged out of some areas very dear to my heart that I was once involved in heavily. Selfishness.

It could have been a simple fix, if I had just let go and trusted. But my heartbreak didn’t bring me back to Him. Instead of drawing closer to Jesus and to those who love me, I withdrew. Went into hiding for a while. So He held me down a little longer.

Most of you probably had no idea. Most of you saw my Sunday face.

Thankfully, I can tell you that I’m starting to come out of it. I’m actually seeing the reasoning behind it all. Sometimes God has to strip us of all of the things that cause pride and ego in our lives. Often, that is the only way to get our complete attention.

And sometimes it takes breaking our hearts. But after the breaking, He is also there… just waiting for us to hand over the pieces to Him.

This song speaks to me so much. We can’t just praise Him in the good times. We have to praise Him and cling to Him in the hard times, too. And maybe, just maybe, we will find the breaking to be the "best thing that's ever happened to us."

I’m so grateful that He will find me when I fall apart.

If you haven't read about my beach worship moment with my son, I hope you will read it here: A Beach Baby's Worship. Moments like this have helped my healing.


6 Responses to "Tune-In Tuesday: Fall Apart"

  • Shannon Milholland Says:

    This song definitely echoes my heart. I want to fall apart right into the arms of Jesus. Thanks for sharing!


  • Paula Ebert Says:

    Me too, Shannon. When I heard this on the radio the other day... it really hit me.


  • NovemberSunflower Says:

    I have a Turn it Up Tuesdays post each week. I don't put worship music on it, but all the free songs I find around the internet that day.
    It's nice to see someone doing something similar, but in a more "profound" way.
    Visiting from voiceBoks.


  • Paula Says:

    Thanks! :) I love music and I love Jesus. Thus... the idea of Tune-In Tuesday. :) Glad you stopped by.


  • Michael Ann Says:

    I'm at a really tough time in my life too and find myself retreating from my faith somewhat. Well, my faith practices, but not my faith in God. Sometimes we do need to strip our lives down to the bare bones and just talk to God one on one and be very personal with Him. I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing to retreat a little. To get your wits about you. I hope things are getting better in your life. Thank you for sharing this. Your blog is very inspirational.


  • Paula Says:

    Michael Ann... I agree sometimes we do need to retreat. It's hard to do with 3 kids... and that has been some of my problem. I'm a loner anyway...need that space... and it's tough to get away sometimes. :) THANK YOU for your sweet comments! May God get the glory.


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